Precision instead of power
Maybe you have heard somewhere, that during the persuasion process you should use all the available arguments, approach the matter from all of the directions because finely something has to reach your client.
It's not a good approach.
Persuasion should be precise.
Persuasion should be directed to the other person.
Your arguments should hit with the precision of a sniper, nowadays we use carpet bombings no more, instead we use precisely steered bombs that can reach the target by flying through the window.
To make your arguments that well-aimed it's vital to know others' values and criteria.
I use such distinction, sometimes you can read about values of higher and lower level but it has no bigger meaning if only you can understand the difference well.
Values are for instance: love, peace, wealth, well being, harmony. They are abstract concepts that can be hard to seize.
Criteria precisely point to objects that our motivation is turned on, lets say a new car, ability to persuade others, more time for family etc.
Know the values and criteria of your clients and you will be able to convince them to anything.
Knowing that may not be the easiest task at first, that's why all the time your efforts should be directed to one question: what's important to that person?
It can be indirectly said during the conversation but it's best to ask for that.
Do all the people reveal goals and criteria immediately? Of course not.
How to make them to? The vital aspect is having a good rapport.
When you establish such bond it'll be a lot easier to get to the most hidden criteria.
How to do that?
Here's the right way of getting peoples values and criteria (we assume that a good rapport is present).
You: Question: What's important about...
X: Answer
You: Positive reaction and acknowledgement of the answer. Next
question: And what's important about that?
X: Answer
You: Again positive reaction and acknowledgement of the answer and further questioning until you reach the real criteria.
Of course during that lots of things can happen. Sometimes you don't need that many questions. Sometimes you need even more. Sometimes when the rapport is weak you have to strengthen it and ask again.
On the other hand, if the rapport is good and the person tells you about criteria and you positively repeat them then there will be deepening of the bond and you both will feel a lot better.
You: What's important for you in learning the techniques of
persuasion?
X: I want to convince people more effectively.
You: Great! You want to be more effective in convincing others and
what's so important about that?
X: Hmm, I want to be able to influence my wife.
You: Very good, and what's most important in influencing your wife?
X: I'd like to convince her to buy a new, expensive car...
Bingo! This is the criterion - new, expensive car.
You: Great, you're in the right place because effective techniques of persuasion will let you convince her to buy that new, expensive car and to buy it on the best terms possible.
And this is how it works.
You can wonder if repeating the criteria with the exact same words won't be noticed and misinterpreted. I can assure you that nothing like that will happen.
Why? Because values and criteria are so deeply rooted in peoples minds and hearts that when they hear them they feel like you're talking to what's deepest in them. That's why it doesn't cause any troubles and is strengthening the rapport.
Every time and everywhere think what's most important for the other person. If you know that, you will have the ability to reach the deepest sources of human motivation.
Now all you have to do, is to show that the best way of meeting those values is accepting what you have to offer.
That knowledge is enough to make every persuasion process effective. Techniques described later on this page are only an addition that can be used to strengthen the effect and that are worth doing in order to let you know what actions can be a sabotage to your efforts.